Game Rap Battles
by Sonic103
Summary: rap battles between game characters!
1. Chapter 1

Game Rap Battles!

**Gaaaaaaammmmmmmmmeeeeeeee Rrrrrrraaaaapppppp Baaaaaaatttttlllllleeeeessss s!**

**Megaman!**

**Vs.**

**Samus!**

**BEGIN!**

Megaman: sup' Samus chick, lets see how I rap,

You should have known this battle was a trap!

I've got the homies and space pirates outside, lets see how you battle!

I'll be whipping your ass, like I was using a paddle!

You're just a female version of me, and it makes my skin crawl,

We all thought you were a boy, since you turn into a ball!

You think you can beat me? You're so silly!

You can't beat a guy with a dick, when you have a pussy!

Samus: I'm a super hot chick, with a body suit on,

You're a dumb ass guy who doesn't know about protons.

Your pedophiliac father only made you to stare,

You're a boy with feelings? Well I don't even care!

Watch me shoot down a metroid,

You're a loser who's on steroids!

Watch out for your batteries loser, and your ass!

Because this rap battle will be your last.

Megaman: I'm a super cool guy named Rock,

I gotta cock.

I think it's time to knock you down a peg,

Bitch, spread those legs!

I'm everybody's favorite color, who likes orange?

Uh….well, I can't find anything that rhymes with orange!

Samus: search your data base harder next time, you bitch.

Keep up that mouth, you'll receive a kick!

Why so sexist? Is that how you get your laughs?

Because nobody here is laughing at that!

You're a big time loser, and you're in love with your sis Roll.

Come at me mother fucker, you're gonna get Rick Rollded!

I protect the galaxy, and I do it with style.

You're a jack ass who won't even flash a smile.

I'm gonna punch you in your face, you will feel pain,

Dude, get the hell out of my game!

**Who won?**

**Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**Gaaaaaammmmmmeeeeee Rrrrrraaaaappppp Baaaaaaaattttttllllllleeeeee essssss!**


	2. Chapter 2

Game Rap Battles!

**GAME RAP BATTLES!**

**Ike**

**Vs.**

**Soren!**

**BEGIN!**

Soren: I'm a magical dude, my hearts as cold as ice,

You're a loser with a name like Ike.

I'm the true prince of Daein,

I was a poor dude, but I don't give a damn!

Now I'm facing you, to be honest, I didn't see this coming.

I'll be nice, you have five seconds, start running.

Good luck,

You little fuck!

Ike: you better watch your flammable ass, cause I be struttin',

Oh, you think you're cool cause you're cussin'?

You were the bitch of two old people, and you stay here proud?

Trust me dude, I'll toss you around.

I have the most respectable abilities, no one can defeat me!

I hope you run to the bathroom and cry like a lady!

You're getting nervous, I can tell,

Why don't you just go to hell?

Soren: bad news, something is happening, which is me!

I don't mess with ass holes like you who are crazy.

The Greil mercenaries were better off with out you,

Your father was too!

Of course, it didn't really matter after the black night was done with him,

That was really a shame….like you!

Ike: my sword fighting skills were given to me by my father, I have no shame.

Keep up your raps, but they're really lame.

You're a creeper I found on the streets!

You're a midget, I'm taller than you by like five feet!

So leave me alone, you little elf,

I'll screw you up and put you back on the shelf!

**Who won?**

**Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**GAAAAAMMMMMMEEEEE RRRRRRRRAAAAAAPPPPPP BAAAAAATTTTTTLLLLLEEEEEESSSS SS!**


	3. Chapter 3

Game Rap Battles!

**Game Rap Battles!**

**Metal Sonic**

**Vs.**

**R.O.B**

**BEGIN!**

Metal Sonic: hello audience, it's time to put on a show.

But I must tell you all now, you should know,

That ROB here might only understand two lines,

Which I guess is fine.

Your processor is slow, and it hardly receives any data,

I'm a true machine, don't be a hater.

You remember Gyromite and Stack-up?

Good, cause that's all you know,

Trust me, you're the lowest of the low.

ROB: excuse me, look who is talking!

You're a floating little tool who's too lazy for walking!

I'm from Japan, and I'm lovable too!

All of the Sonic fans really do hate you!

I roll around on some wheels, which is cool.

At least I'm not some power possessed fool.

Metal Sonic: downloading software….

I will get you out of my hair…

Downloading software….

I WILL get rid of you….

ROB: umm…okay?

It was supposed to be your turn, but I guess I can say,

My insults, which will slap you in your face,

Put your horrible software in it's place!

While you're downloading software, I'm burning you more!

I have to admit, I didn't expect too much from Eggman's whore.

Metal Sonic:….*becomes metal madness*

Metal Madness: ROOOOOOOAAAAAARRRRR!

Bring it on you whore!

When you fuck with me, I settle the score!

I downloaded all life form data, I'll be bringing some tears!

Trust me pal, I'm your worst fears!

Watch me tear apart your friends and spit out lasers!

You would never find a final boss that's any crazier!

**who won?**

**who's next?**

**you decide!**

**GGGGGGGAAAAAAMMMMMMMEEEEEE RRRRRRRRAAAAAPPPPPP BBBBBBBAAAATTTTTLLLLLEEEEESS SS!**


	4. Chapter 4

Game Rap Battles

**Game Rap Battles!**

**Peach**

**Vs.**

**Zelda!**

**BEGIN!**

Peach: hello world, it's your favorite Princess Peach!

And this time, I'll be fighting a elf eared bitch.

All you fans out there know I can slap real hard,

And my gold club could send you far.

Zelda, you rely on a twelve year old kid to save your ass,

I really think you should just return to the past.

Zelda: Princess Peach, I think you may have that dress on too tight,

I'm totally capable for putting up a fight!

YOU rely on a mustached drug attic to save you from TURTLES,

Seeing you thank him makes me want to hurl!

I know you may be more well known, but don't get cocky,

We all know here that the best is me!

Peach: take a step back, in fact, just go outside.

At least I haven't had Ganondorf mess up my mind!

In some games, I'm actually tough!

And with that, I suggest we start getting rough.

What kind of name is Zelda anyways?

Nobody knows,

I guess it doesn't really matter, cause you're a slut that just passes through!

Zelda: I should have seen this day coming,

I really need to see.

No BEING could compare to me!

Not the hero of time,

Not the ittalian plumber,

But I think I'd give both of them my number.

Princess Peach, you're a human AND a turtles whore,

When their done, I bet you go look for more!

I will go back to the past, since this present sucks.

Maybe we'll see each other again later on,

But for now, so long slut!

**Who won?**

**Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**Ggggggggggggggggaaaaaaaaaaam mmmmmmeeeeeeeeeee Rrrrrrrrrrraaappppp Baaaatttttllllllleeeessss!**


	5. Chapter 5

Game Rap Battles!

**Game Rap Battles!**

**King Koopa**

**Vs.**

**King K. Rool!**

**BEGIN!**

King Koopa: hello K. Rool, it's time I show you around.

Better watch your back, cause I'll be after your crown.

I breathe fire and have spikes on my back,

And I have so many minions, it's hard to keep track.

You're a crazy old crocodile who's after some bannanas,

Did you know 'hit and runs' are not actually plans?

King K. Rool: Bowser, you're not a real king.

To Mario and Luigi, you're just a pain.

I'm a fantastic king who knows how to rock bling.

I have so many minions, I'll make rain from them!

You have a couple plumbers to fight, I face an ape!

We all know your "relationship" with Peach is just a fake!

King Koopa: yeah right loser, what are you talking about?

Better watch what you say, I'll slash off your mouth!

At least I could get a girl, and Dixie doesn't count!

I bet you'd love to get some Candy, but that'd never happen.

What's really sad is that you suck at rapping!

King K. Rool: what ever dude, you think you're so clever?

I'll beat you so bad, you'll be drowning in a river!

You should know, I eat turtles for breakfast!

I'm like a cop, and its your raps that I'll be arrestin'!

Cause they're so horrible, everyone complains,

Nobody wants you here, go jump in front of some trains!

Man, you used to be cool, but now you're so lame.

I think Nintendo worked too hard to make you tame!

**Who won?**

**Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**Gaaaaaammmmmmeeeeee Rrrrrrrrrraaaaaaaapppppp Baaaaaatttttllllllleeeeeesss sss!**


	6. Chapter 6

Game Rap Battles!

**Game Rap Battles!**

**Mario**

**Vs.**

**Sonic**

**BEGIN!**

Sonic: Sega Genesis, that was what the kids were playin',

Even the adults had loved a hedgehog that could go super saiyan,

Their true hero was a super cool blue dude,

Who they hated was a hooker loving drug addict with an attitude!

C'mon dude, all the Sonic fans know,

That when it comes to something with speed, I put on a show!

So c'mon plumber, lets see you beat that,

Better think twice before you talk back!

Mario: hi-a audience, hello!

It's a-me, Mario!

It's time I think that the blue animal should go!

I'm known for shooting fireballs out-a my hand,

And-a we all know that my kart skills are just grand!

When you're in spin dash, I'll kick you like a ball,

Sega whores is what your fans are called!

I cannot be defeated by some forest animal,

Any chances of you winning are fictional!

Sonic: you can keep on hating, but I'm not messing around!

Keep up your shit, I'll kick you into town!

The only people you're fooling are your creators,

And of course, the really weird creepers.

Mario, if you push me enough, I'll rip off your mustache!

I won? I got a prize? I'll take cash!

Mario: you better ask for money, cause no one's buying your games,

Your reputation of bad games is your only fame!

You keep running after those rings, then I'll-a punch you,

You'll be out of rings, and then-a another punch will turn you into goo!

Your stupid Sega Genesis could never compare to the NES,

You're-a never gonna forget this day you!

I'm-a gonna turn you into a hedgehog Barbeque!

**Who won?**

**Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**Gaaaaaaaammmmmmmeeeeeee Rrrrrrrrrrraaaaaaappppppp Baaaaaattttttllllllllleeeeee sssss!**


	7. Chapter 7

Video Game Rap Battles!

**Viiiiiiiiddddddeeeeooooo Gaaaaaammmmmmeeeee Rrrrraaaaaap Baaaaattttllllleeessss!**

**Mewtwo**

**Vs.**

**Lucario**

**BEGIN!**

Lucario: what's up little dork? I'm fighting you?

You're not competition, you're not even the real Mew!

I'm a well known fighting type, who's the best in the game,

You're a psychic type that can't even be labeled lame.

All you do is sit in one place, that's cerulean cave,

Hell, you and all the other legendaries are the same!

Fan boys think you're cool, with your legendary title,

But in real life, nobody bothers getting riled.

I don't know why I'm still here, you're not worth the fight,

I've got the aura on my side, and it's time to say good night.

Mewtwo: of course pokemon think you're a hero,

But in real life you're a zero,

I've got nothing to fear ho,

I've been waiting to whoop your ass in a fight, but this isn't voluntary though.

I can see into your mind, and I sense your fear,

You think any of your puns would make me shed a tear?

I'm a master of tricks, is that a coin behind your ear?

Lucario: don't touch me moron, have you ever washed your hands?

In that terrible movie, you had a terrible plan,

After you lost, you dissolved and never returned,

A waste of DNA, and you wasted a turn,

Talking about tricks?

Have you ever gotten any pussy?

I hang with a gym leader,

Who can never get enough of me.

Trying to attack me with water or grass?

Even if you tried flying you would get tossed like trash,

I'll beat you so bad all you can do is struggle and thrash.

What ever clone you toss at me, I'll make them fall,

You weren't even good enough to get into Brawl!

Mewtwo: I wasn't accepted into Brawl, because I'm so powerful,

They hardly wanted you, since you're so terrible.

Get ready for a confusion, since you absolutely suck,

By the way, you won't find shit under that truck.

I'm kicking your butt, and I'm not even trying,

Silly Lucario, Psychic beats Fighting!

**Who won? Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**VVVVVVIIIIIDDDDDDEEEEEOOOOO GGGGGAAAAAMMMMMEEEE RRRRRAAAAPPPPP BAAAAATTTTTLLLLLEEESSSS!**


	8. Chapter 8

Video Game Rap Battles

**Viiiiiiddddddeeeeeooooo Gaaaaaammmmmeeee Rrrrraaaaapppp Baaaatttlllleeeessss!**

**Red**

**Vs.**

**Ethan**

**BEGIN!**

Ethan: so it looks like, this is the final battle maybe?

But you're not going to be playing any games with me.

There's no way you can get out of this situation,

And stay alert, this battle will require your full participation.

I really don't know how you can stand this cold,

But admirably you challenging was pretty bold,

But I'm the reason the next Gen games got sold,

And I'm the king of pokemon Silver and Gold!

I get all the bitches, like Lyra and Whiteny,

All you have is your mom who kisses your boo boos and wipes your hiney!

Red: this is the first time in years,

That I've had to step up and make gamers go to tears,

But today it's not the fans who are losing,

It's you, who never grew a pair and never managed to bruise me!

I'll send out Pikachu first, and try to wreck your shit,

What Pokemon will be next? Well I don't have to pick,

Sense that little mouse wiped out your entire team,

There's never been a team that's ever truly defeated me!

I'm talking to you action replay users,

Thinking you should fight someone better than me,

But hey, beggers can't be choosers!

I rock the red hat, jeans, and yellow back pack,

And you rock the mother fuckers who never gave me any slack!

Heart Gold and Soul Silver were okay I guess,

But your story line was written by shit at best!

Ethan: I can't believe you pick at my games,

When we all know that being first is your only cling to fame,

You're named after a color for Arceus's sake man! Give me a brake!

I'm gonna take you down, while your pride is at stake!

If I've never beaten you truly then how do I know,

That after I won, you bowed your head then GTFO'd,

Your Snorlax is a joke, your Pikachu is weak,

Why don't you come and find me?

I'm done with playing hide and seek!

Sending out Typhlosion and killing Venesaur is just too easy,

Just like Falkner, you've never been able to kill me!

What's won't you talk to me Red? Pussy got your tongue?

Wait that's wrong, since you've never seen one!

Red: if that's what you think, go Blastoise,

I tried to be nice, but you leave me no choice.

I guess I'll use a potion, and maybe a revive,

Now that I'm up, why don't you try and hide?

I'm the Pokemon Master, just ask Blue,

All the females are my bitches, and that includes you.

I'm officially a teenager, you're ten years old,

You were never meant to be the protagonist of any game at all,

You're just a ditto, copying my every move,

You're worse at solving crimes than Scooby Fucking Doo,

You took down an executive, I took down Giovanni!

What makes you so arrogant, I don't get it honestly!

Why can't younger fans realize,

That the Trainer named Red will always stay alive!

**Who won? Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**Vvvvvvvviiiiiiiddddddeeeeeoo ooooo Gaaaaaammmmmeeeee Rrrrrrraaaaapppppp Baaaaaatttttlllllleeeeeeesss ss!**


	9. Chapter 9

Video Game Rap Battles

**Vviiiiiiidddddeeeeeeeooooooo Gaaaaaammmmmmeeeeeee Rrrrrrraaaaappppp Baaaaattttttllllllleeeeeesss s!**

**Lucas**

**Vs. **

**Ness!**

**BEGIN!**

Ness: My name's Ness, but you wouldn't know me Lucas,

Because you're spending all of your time whining and having fits,

I may not talk a lot, but I have a few things to say about you,

You're not skilled enough to be a protagonist, not useful enough for a shoe,

You're about to see how bad ass a character's supposed to be,

You can't beat my PSI, you see?

All of my street homies, let me hear you shout,

This kid's got three strikes, and he's out!

Lucas: I can't stand to see mother fuckers like you,

Going around, thinking they're worth being in a game too.

Ness, what game are you in, Mother 2 or Earthbound?

I don't care which, I'm done with you clowning around!

Make all your base ball puns, see if I care,

You can't take all of the credit, why don't you share? Seeing you being modest is pretty rare.

Why don't you say anything in your games?

Too shy?

Because you and Porky are such hugs pussies I can't tell you're a guy!

Now I know all your fans are like "that's not true",

Well they don't know the real asshole that's you!

Ness: getting some cheap hits are you?

I admit it, I can be a little cocky,

But I'm a huge Nintendo star, who's gonna stop me?

I'm real disappointed, why didn't you finish off drowning yourself?

Now you see, my rhymes actually take away some health!

It's time for you to take a Yo-Yo to the face,

It's time to say good night and get back in your place!

…...

Just kidding!

Loser, why would I stop if I'm winning?

You can't dis me!

If you wanna know, I'm just itching

To get back into the battle,

I'm sick of the rattle,

You're causing.

Keep talking I'm walking.

Face it Lucas,

I've already won.

I would tell you to go home and cry to your mom, but you don't even have one!

Lucas: you fool!

You're tiny rapping skills couldn't ever compare to my skills,

You try keeping your head underwater,

Like you were rocking gills.

No one can stand to listen to your rants,

What? You thought doing this would get a girl in your pants?

Nobody would dare touch the zipper of those shorts,

I might as well keep my pants off, sure, call me a whore!

But at least I could get some girls,

All you got is sausage fests going on in your world.

I'm gonna leave you to fight Gygas with 1 HP,

Give you three seconds, and you'll begging to be freed.

But I'll just let you sit there and stuggle like a worm,

Call me a baby all you want, but-

PSI STARSTORM!

**Who won?**

**Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**Viiiiiiiidddddddeeeeeeooooo Gaaaaaammmmmmmeeeee Rrrrrrraaaaaapppp Baaaaattttllllleeessss!**


	10. Chapter 10

Video Game Rap Battles

**Vvvvvvviiiiiiiiiiiiiddddddddddddeeeeeeeeoooooo Gggggggaaaaaaammmmmmmeeeeeeee Rrrrrrrraaaaapppppp Baaaaaattttttttllllllleeeeeeeesssss!**

**Kirby**

**Vs.**

**Jigglypuff!**

**BEGIN!**

Kirby: holy crap Jigglypuff, what the hell are you?

A cat marshmallow thing that rocks a curl doo?

You're a bitch with a jelly belly,

And no rack to show,

You may be a virgin but you're a real hoe!

Now why don't you do something useful and make me some food?

Not gonna make an argument? Well it's all good!

I'll try to just finish this off,

I'll always be known as the best of the soft!

Jigglypuff: why are you so mean Kirby?

Is it that time of the month?

Cause nobody has knows what gender you are,

And I've had enough!

Fatass,

Sucking everything, including dicks!

I see those red blushes, it must be true!

Don't give me those ugly eyes, I'll cut you in two.

I don't need no HM crap to do it,

I can't learn Cut? Well that's bull shit!

And you'll all know that's true, when your blood hit's floor,

And your blood will get all over walls for sure.

Vampires, don't drink it, you'll get diabetes,

No offense to anyone out there, by the way.

Kirby: keep insulting me bitch, I'll just slash you with a sword,

I'm the king of battle, I'll show you what I'm for!

I'm sick of your face,

All you do is irritate.

Me, my gang and Meta Knight go all out,

We get in our pimp cars and we roll out.

My name is Kirby, I'm the cutest of them all!

Get ready to get caught for my Master Balls!

Jigglypuff: yeah right moron, give me a brick break,

You say you have balls, but they're fake.

I've got millions of fans,

They all love me,

Fan boys go out of their ways to make sure I'm on their teams!

I can't believe they would let you star any game,

Even if was just puzzles and it was totally lame!

I may be a poor singer, but I'm a bad ass rapper,

If you hadn't made so many sexual jokes, you're people would have supported you longer!

Face it kid, you're not skilled,

If you couldn't fly into the air, you'd be an easy kill!

Little wanna be, give me a break!

Your small balls don't have a 1% catch rate!

It's time you say good bye,

You're getting sleepy from my song, good fucking night.

**Who won?**

**Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**Viiiiiiidddddddeeeeeeeoooooo Gaaaaaammmmmmeeeeee Rrrrrraaaaaaapppppp Baaaaaatttttttlllllllleeeeeesssss!**


	11. Chapter 11

Video Game Rap Battles

**Viddddeeeeeoooooo Gaaaaaammmmmmmeeeeee Rrrrrraaaaaappppp Baaaaatttttllllllleeeeeesssss!**

**Fox!**

**Vs.**

**Wolf!**

**Begin!**

Fox: Attack!

Charge!

We don't care if we barge

In on a wolf mating session,

We'll take you down.

I'm from the StarFox team, and we don't fuck around!

Our Arwings going faster than the speed of sound!

Nobody likes Grey Wolves cause they don't got pretty faces,

I've put up with a lot of you, now I'm running out of patience.

Don't relax, I'm not done yet!

Wolf: I can't let you do that Starfox,

I've got a rap that'll knock your socks off.

I'm a big bad wolf, you're a bushy tailed loser,

Not even cool enough to get a first person shooter.

You're who game series is a joke, it's dead,

Like your father, there's no reason to pretend!

I come up and take you down, ruining your confidence,

And I'll kill you and your whole team with no conscience.

Better step aside kid, I'm going to rip you to shreds,

You never caught me, neither did the feds.

I'm the hide and seek champion, no one ever found me,

And being hidden all that time made me feel angry.

You want to know my name? It's Wolf O'Donnell,

And I'm gonna make sure you're blasted six feet into hell!

Fox: keep talking Wolf, you don't scare me,

Acting all tough and being unhappy,

But under that wolf skin is a true pussy,

Getting cold with Andross and trying to warm up to me!

Then just to go and get into lots more trouble,

Then me and my team show up on the double.

So come out me bro, I'll shoot you in the face,

Leaving your corpse with no single trace,

Of us being there, we're like ninjas dude.

Get out of here and don't give me an attitude!

Wolf: I can't lose!

To this guy who's gay

For Bill Grey,

And does anything that Peppy Hare says,

I act tough? Look at you Mr. Orphan,

Like I said your games a joke, and so is your only fan.

And that's your boyfriend Falco, some stupid bluebird.

And with the gayest voices I've ever heard!

You're on my turf now Fox, so watch your step!

Don't worry, I'll make sure your corpse is found,

And I'll be sure to let everyone know I was the one to take you down!

By the way, I having something to tell you about your girl Krystal,

I took her to the Sargasso Space Zone and showed her my shotgun.

She said she'd never go back to you again,

Saying my dick is her best friend!

Sorry I had to wail on you kid,

But next time, don't go against someone with a right state of mind!

**Who won?**

**Who's next?**

**You decide!**

**Vvvvvviiiiiiidddddddeeeeeooooo Gaaaaaammmmmmeeeee Rrrrrraaaapppp Baaaaatttttllllleeeesssss!**


End file.
